Covid-19

A Pain in the Neck, Vaccines & 12th Surgery

Health, Life
back to reality

As I sit down to write this post, I’m wondering, ‘How do I segway from writing about my spiritual awakening/ journey to writing about the day-to-day Bullshit of “real” life? ‘

Then I thought of that funky song from the 80’s by
Soul II Soul ~~

Back to Life,
Back to Reality,
Back to the Here and Now…

So, on that Note..

After my Neck Fusion in 2020, the surrounding muscles/tendons/ligaments/fascia of the right neck/shoulder/upper back continued to ache and feel like a tightrope. This was one reason why I had the surgery in the first place; hoping to alleviate some of that constant pulling/taught sensation. Unfortunately, it was not any better and possibly worse now, due to the restricting movement. The surgery had helped with the numbness and tingling extending through my right arm and a little bit of pain but the surrounding tissues were still extremely sore.

During the Spring of `21 I found myself at appointment after appointment trying to find some kind of relief. I tried Acupuncture with mixed success: only the first treatment was wonderful, after that– nothing. I went to a wonderful Chiropractor for a few months (and consequently, discovered the amazing NYC Halal Eats whose Lamb & Rice Combo is TO DIE FOR!!!) Dr. Noomie did very gentle work to align my upper and lower spine, hoping to alleviate some discomfort. I felt on Cloud 9 after a session but the feeling didn’t last too long and eventually I stopped going. Same with Medical Massage — it felt incredible for a few hours, but never lasted! I even resorted to Neck Injections — again! All of these modalities provided a small bit of temporary relief, but nothing lasting. So I continued on, living in pain…

virus

As soon as the COVID-19 Vaccine was available, we jumped on board. Although I’m not officially in the “comprised” community, I couldn’t chance getting the virus given my chronic autoimmune diseases. Nor could my husband, as the sole bread winner and business owner. Dylan was also eligible, given his age, and soon afterward, Ethan received the vaccine.

In May (just as Diane Hiller, medical intuitive had predicted) I had my 6th joint replacement/12th surgery (not including two c-sections); for the injured knee that had been “loose” since I was a kid. It had finally begun to really hurt and made stairs or any amount of standing/walking vey painful. When it came time to have it done, I went to one of the best orthopedic surgeons — Dr. Perry Green. I had met Dr. Green 22 years ago when he performed my very first joint replacement in 1999 — my left hip shown here, which is still going strong to this day! You can also see my Lower Lumber Fusion – 2010 also going strong!

The operation went perfect. I had a nerve block so that my entire leg was pretty numb for the first 24 hours or so resulting in minimal pain. I stayed in the hospital one night and recuperated at home. The hospital sent a Physical Therapist to my home for the first week to teach me the various exercises to ensure my knee did not stiffen up. I did my exercises diligently and eventually made a full recovery with wonderful range of motion and almost no pain! Once the incision was fully closed, I applied my THC/CBD cream which helped with post-surgical pain and scar healing. Now, the incision is barely noticeable. I’m able to walk and do stairs without any pain now. However, after being active for a while, it starts to swell a bit and gets a little achy. Just my reminder to sit down and take it easy!

  • Misaligned Knee
  • Bone-on-Bone
  • New Knee Joint
  • Bionic Knee
  • Recuperating
  • All Healed!

Dark Night of the Soul

Health, Life

2020 was a very difficult year for me. Starting out with that awful elbow revision in January from COVID-19 forcing all of us indoors into our shared spaces with little to do except drive each other CRAZY, to my summer of high blood pressure, hot flashes, and failed ACDF surgery, and not to mention I found the current President absolutely vile (but not everyone in my circle felt the same) which only made my loathing of him even more profound and at odds with certain loved ones. Again — circle back to Insanity.

I worried about my failing body, knowing full-well that people like me don’t age gracefully and usually expire early due to complications of the disease. Would my elbow need another revision? Would it even be possible? What happens if it isn’t? I was terrified to use it given the Hell that I went through. How long would these ankles last me? I was already going on 10 and 9 years respectfully; longer than my doctor had envisioned. When were they going to give out? My right hand is deforming more and more each year – and often the tendons seize up (which makes it very hard to paint, type, write, anything fine motor) and have to be forced back into place. My left shoulder was acting up also – what the fuck was this now?

By the end of the year I was feeling like a caged tiger — in my mind, in my body, in my spirit, in my family, in my home, in my community, in my world. Nobody was getting along, I felt unloved, unsupported, and misunderstood by my family, betrayed by my body, convinced my soul had a plan to leave early, so why even bother trying? Why did I incarnate into this extremely challenging life? What was the point of any of it? I felt so down and lost and couldn’t see a way out. I thought very seriously about giving up and letting go; I even had a plan. However, I couldn’t do that to my husband and kids, my parents, my closest friends. I had to find a way out of the deep dark hole…

Fifty

Life

Happy Birthday To Me

So, I finally turned 50! I can’t really believe it. Mentally I still feel like a kid most days and physically– well, physically I feel 100! So, I guess 50 makes sense! Having a milestone birthday during this Pandemic is a huge letdown. I’d told my husband years ago that I wanted to do something big for my 50th; like a hot air balloon ride over some gorgeous place — Italy-Paris? Or vacation in the Maldives or do an African Safari – just the two of us. Or perhaps a tummy-tuck with a side of liposuction? If I was able – I think I would love to try skydiving!

Needless to say none of those occured. The day was quite uneventful but my boys made the best of it. They snuck out and brought me Tim Hortons in the morning. In the evening I was treated to Chicken Shack ribs and a spinning musical flower with candles atop my favorite carrot cake from J. Alexanders — Yummy 🙂

The table was decorated with really beautiful champagne-colored balloons with tiny LEDs inside that stayed lit for days. My friends and family had sent flower arrangements and my husband gave me two sweet necklaces that fit together — representing our family. While it wasn’t the birthday I’d hoped for, we made the best of it — and years from now I’ll always remember turning 50 during the Great Pandemic of 2020.